Dr. Ruth Westheimer, America’s diminutive and pioneering sex therapist, dies at 96

NEW YORK (AP) — Dr. Ruth Westheimer, the diminutive sex therapist who became a pop icon, media star and bestselling author through her frank talk about once-taboo bedroom topics, has died. She was 96.

Westheimer died Friday at her home in New York City, surrounded by her family, according to publicist and friend Pierre Lehu.

Westheimer never advocated risky sexual behavior. Instead, she encouraged open dialogue on previously closeted issues that affected her audience of millions. Her one recurring theme was there was nothing to be ashamed of.

“I still hold old-fashioned values, and I'm a bit of a square,” she told students at Michigan City High School in 2002. “Sex is a private art and a private matter. But still, it is a subject we must talk about.”

Westheimer's giggly, German-accented voice, coupled with her 4-foot-7 frame, made her an unlikely looking — and sounding — outlet for “sexual literacy.” The contradiction was one of the keys to her success.

But it was her extensive knowledge and training, coupled with her humorous, nonjudgmental manner, that catapulted her local radio program, “Sexually Speaking,” into the national spotlight in the early 1980s. She had an open approach to what two consenting adults did in the privacy of their home.

“Tell him you’re not going to initiate,” she told a concerned caller in June 1982. “Tell him that Dr. Westheimer said that you’re not going to die if he doesn’t have sex for one week.”

Her radio success opened new doors, and in 1983 she wrote the first of more than 40 books: “Dr. Ruth’s Guide to Good Sex,” demystifying sex with both rationality and humor. There was even a board game, Dr. Ruth’s Game of Good Sex.

She soon became a regular on the late-night television talk-show circuit, bringing her personality to the national stage. Her rise coincided with the early days of the AIDS epidemic, when frank sexual talk became a necessity.

“If we could bring about talking about sexual activity the way we talk about diet — the way we talk about food — without it having this kind of connotation that there’s something not right about it, then we would be a step further. But we have to do it with good taste,” she told Johnny Carson in 1982.

She normalized the use of words like “penis” and “vagina” on radio and TV, aided by her Jewish grandmotherly accent, which The Wall Street Journal once said was “a cross between Henry Kissinger and Minnie Mouse.” People magazine included her in its list of “The Most Intriguing People of the Century.” She even made it into a Shania Twain song: “No, I don’t need proof to show me the truth/Not even Dr. Ruth is gonna tell me how I feel.”

Westheimer defended abortion rights, suggested older people have sex after a good night’s sleep, and was an outspoken advocate of condom use. She believed in monogamy.

In the 1980s, she stood up for gay men at the height of the AIDS epidemic and spoke out loudly for the LGBTQ+ community. She said she defended people deemed by some far-right Christians to be “subhuman” because of her own past.

Born Karola Ruth Siegel in Frankfurt, Germany, in 1928, she was an only child. At 10, she was sent by her parents to Switzerland to escape Kristallnacht — the Nazis’ 1938 pogrom that served as a precursor to the Holocaust. She never saw her parents again; Westheimer believed they were killed in the gas chambers at Auschwitz.

At age 16, she moved to Palestine and joined the Haganah, the underground movement for Israeli independence. She was trained as a sniper, although she said she never shot at anyone.

Her legs were severely wounded when a bomb exploded in her dormitory, killing many of her friends. She said it was only through the work of a “superb” surgeon that she could walk and ski again.

In 1961, after a second divorce, she finally met her life partner: Manfred Westheimer, a fellow refugee from Nazi Germany. The couple married and had a son, Joel. They remained wed for 36 years until Fred, as she called him, died of heart failure in 1997.

In 1984, her radio program was nationally syndicated. A year later, she debuted in her own television program, “The Dr. Ruth Show,” which went on to win an Ace Award for excellence in cable television.

She also wrote a nationally syndicated advice column and later appeared in a line of videos produced by Playboy, preaching the virtues of open sexual discourse and good sex. She even had a series of calendars.

Her rise was noteworthy for the culture of the time, when President Ronald Reagan’s administration was hostile to Planned Parenthood and aligned with conservative voices.

Phyllis Schlafly, a staunch antifeminist, wrote in a 1999 piece called “The Dangers of Sex Education” that Westheimer, as well as Gloria Steinem, Anita Hill, Madonna, Ellen DeGeneres and others, were promoting “provocative sex chatter” and “rampant immorality.”

Westheimer's books include “Sex for Dummies” and her autobiographical works “All in a Lifetime” (1987) and “Musically Speaking: A Life Through Song” (2003). The documentary “Ask Dr. Ruth” aired in 2019, and a new book, "The Joy of Connections," is due in October.

Survivors include two children, Joel and Miriam, and four grandchildren.

FILE - Dr. Ruth Westheimer, foreground center, watches President Barack Obama and first lady Michelle Obama at the Western Inaugural Ball in Washington, Tuesday, Jan. 20, 2009. Westheimer, the sex therapist who became a pop icon, media star and best-selling author through her frank talk about once-taboo bedroom topics, died on Friday, July 12, 2024. She was 96. (AP Photo/Pablo Martinez Monsivais, File)

FILE - New Penthouse Pet of the Year Ginger Miller, left, of Los Angeles, talks with sex therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer, both embraced by Penthouse publisher Bob Guccione at a party in Miller's honor in New York on Monday, Dec. 6, 1988. Westheimer, the sex therapist who became a pop icon, media star and best-selling author through her frank talk about once-taboo bedroom topics, died on Friday, July 12, 2024. She was 96. (AP Photo/Gerald Herbert, File)

FILE - Dr. Ruth Westheimer signs a copy of her book "Sexually Speaking" in New York on April 26, 2012. (AP Photo/Richard Drew, File)

FILE - Talk show host Phil Donahue, center, poses with several other prominent television personalities after the taping of "Donahue: The 25th Anniversary," in New York, Oct. 1992. From left, Jenny Jones, Dr. Ruth Westheimer, Faith Daniels, Larry King, Donahue, Connie Chung, Maury Povich, Jerry Springer and Montel Williams. Westheimer, the sex therapist who became a pop icon, media star and best-selling author through her frank talk about once-taboo bedroom topics, died on Friday, July 12, 2024. She was 96. (AP Photo/Joe Major, File)

Dr. Ruth Westheimer holds a copy of her book "Sex for Dummies" at the International Frankfurt Book Fair 'Frankfurter Buchmesse' in Frankfurt, Germany, Thursday, Oct. 11, 2007. Westheimer, the sex therapist who became a pop icon, media star and best-selling author through her frank talk about once-taboo bedroom topics, died on Friday, July 12, 2024. She was 96. (AP Photo/Bernd Kammerer)

FILE - Sex therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer talks with rock singer Cyndi Lauper in New York, Jan. 17, 1985. Westheimer, the sex therapist who became a pop icon, media star and best-selling author through her frank talk about once-taboo bedroom topics, died on Friday, July 12, 2024. She was 96. (AP Photo/Nancy Kaye, File)

FILE - Dr. Ruth mingles at the Salesforce Music Lodge during the Sundance Film Festival on Saturday, Jan. 26, 2019, in Park City, Utah. Dr. Ruth Westheimer, the diminutive sex therapist who became a pop icon, media star and best-selling author through her frank talk about once-taboo bedroom topics, has died. She was 96. Westheimer died on Friday, July 2, 2024, at her home in New York City, surrounded by her family, according to publicist and friend Pierre Lehu. (Photo by Miles Mortensen/ Invision for The Salesforce Music Lodge/AP Images, File)

Dr. Ruth Westheimer, America’s diminutive and pioneering sex therapist, dies at 96

FILE - Dr. Ruth Westheimer participates in the "Ask Dr. Ruth" panel during the Hulu presentation at the Television Critics Association Winter Press Tour at The Langham Huntington, Monday, Feb. 11, 2019, in Pasadena, Calif. Dr. Ruth Westheimer, the diminutive sex therapist who became a pop icon, media star and best-selling author through her frank talk about once-taboo bedroom topics, has died. She was 96. Westheimer died on Friday, July 12, 2024, at her home in New York City, surrounded by her family, according to publicist and friend Pierre Lehu. (Photo by Willy Sanjuan/Invision/AP, File)

Dr. Ruth Westheimer, America’s diminutive and pioneering sex therapist, dies at 96

BANGKOK (AP) — Sweeping new tariffs announced Wednesday by U.S. President Donald Trump provoked dismay, threats of countermeasures and calls for further negotiations to make trade rules fairer.

But responses were measured, highlighting a lack of appetite among key trading partners for an outright trade war with the world's biggest economy.

Trump said the import taxes, ranging from 10% to 49%, would do to U.S. trading partners what they have long done to the U.S. He maintains they will draw factories and jobs back to the United States.

“Taxpayers have been ripped off for more than 50 years,” he said. “But it is not going to happen anymore.”

Trump's announcement of a new 20% tariff on the European Union drew a sharp rebuke from European Commission President Ursula von der Leyen, who said it was a “major blow to the world economy.”

“The consequences will be dire for millions of people around the globe,” von der Leyen said. Groceries, transport and medicines will cost more, she said while visiting Uzbekistan, “And this is hurting, in particular, the most vulnerable citizens.”

Von der Leyen acknowledged that the world trading system has “serious deficiencies” and said the EU was ready to negotiate with the U.S. but also was prepared to respond with countermeasures.

British Prime Minister Kier Starmer said the U.K. government would react with “cool and calm heads.”

“Clearly, there will be an economic impact,” he said, telling business leaders in London that he hopes to get the tariffs lifted with a trade deal with Washington.

“Nobody wins in a trade war, that is not in our national interest,” Starmer said.

Japan, America's closest ally in Asia, plans to closely analyze the U.S. tariffs and their impact, Chief Cabinet Secretary Yoshimasa Hayashi said, while refraining from talk of retaliation. But he said the moves would have a big impact on relations with the U.S.

Italy’s conservative Premier Giorgia Meloni said the higher tariffs would benefit neither side.

“We will do everything we can to work towards an agreement with the United States, with the aim of avoiding a trade war that would inevitably weaken the West in favor of other global players,” Meloni said in a Facebook post.

Brazil, hit with a 10% tariff, said it was considering appealing to the World Trade Organization. Its congress unanimously passed a bill to allow retaliation for any tariffs on Brazilian goods.

Financial markets were jolted, with U.S. stock futures down by as much as 3% early Thursday and a 2.8% drop in Tokyo’s benchmark leading losses in Asia. Oil prices sank more than $2 a barrel.

“The magnitude of the rollout — both in scale and speed — wasn’t just aggressive; it was a full-throttle macro disruption,” Stephen Innes of SPI Asset Management said in a commentary.

While the longer-term ramifications could encompass a dismantling of supply chains built up over decades, a more immediate concern is the higher risk of recession.

“The (average) U.S. tariff rate on all imports is now around 22%, from 2.5% in 2024. That rate was last seen around 1910," Olu Sonola, Fitch Ratings’ head of U.S. Economic Research, said in a report.

"This is a game changer, not only for the U.S. economy but for the global economy. Many countries will likely end up in a recession. You can throw most forecasts out the door, if this tariff rate stays on for an extended period of time,” Sonola said.

The burden falls heaviest on Asia-Pacific nations, with the highest tariffs for impoverished, financially precarious countries like Laos at a 48% tariff, Cambodia at 49% and Myanmar at 44%.

Asian countries that are among the biggest exporters to the U.S. pledged to act fast to support automakers and other businesses likely to be affected.

South Korean Prime Minister Han Duck-soo told officials to work with business groups to analyze the impact of the new 25% tariff to “minimize damage,” the trade ministry said.

China's commerce ministry said Beijing would “resolutely take countermeasures to safeguard its own rights and interests,” without saying exactly what it might do. With earlier rounds of tariffs China reacted by imposing higher duties on U.S. exports of farm products, while limiting exports of minerals used for high-tech industries such as electric vehicles.

“China urges the United States to immediately cancel its unilateral tariff measures and properly resolve differences with its trading partners through equal dialogue,” it said.

Mexican President Claudia Sheinbaum said she would wait to see how Trump’s announcement will affect Mexico, which like Canada was spared for goods already qualified under their free trade agreement with the United States, though previously announced 25% tariffs on auto imports took effect Thursday.

“It’s not a question of if you impose tariffs on me, I’m going to impose tariffs on you,” she said Wednesday morning. “Our interest is in strengthening the Mexican economy.”

Canada had imposed retaliatory tariffs in response to the 25% tariffs that Trump tied to the trafficking of fentanyl. The European Union, in response to the steel and aluminum tariffs, has imposed taxes on 26 billion euros’ worth ($28 billion) of U.S. goods, including bourbon, prompting Trump to threaten a 200% tariff on European alcohol.

Some countries took issue with the White House's calculations.

Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese said the tariffs were totally unwarranted, but Australia will not retaliate.

“President Trump referred to reciprocal tariffs. A reciprocal tariff would be zero, not 10%,” said Albanese. The U.S. and Australia have a free trade agreement and the U.S. has a $2-to-$1 trade surplus with Australia. “This is not the act of a friend.”

Trump said the United States bought $3 billion of Australian beef last year, but Australia would not accept U.S. beef imports. Albanese said the ban on raw U.S. beef was for biosecurity reasons.

A 29% tariff imposed on the tiny South Pacific outpost of Norfolk Island came as a shock. The Australian territory has a population of around 2,000 people and the economy revolves around tourism.

“To my knowledge, we do not export anything to the United States,” Norfolk Island Administrator George Plant, the Australian government’s representative on the island, told the AP Thursday. “We don’t charge tariffs on anything. I can’t think of any non-tariff barriers that would be in place either, so we’re scratching our heads here.”

“We don’t have a 20% tariff rate,” said New Zealand's Trade Minister Todd McClay. But he said New Zealand did not intend to retaliate. "That would put up prices on New Zealand consumers and it would be inflationary,” he said.

As Trump read the list of countries that would be targeted, he repeatedly said he didn’t blame them for the trade barriers they imposed to protect their own nations’ businesses. “But we’re doing the same thing right now,” he said.

“In the face of unrelenting economic warfare, the United States can no longer continue with a policy of unilateral economic surrender,” Trump said.

Speaking from a business forum in India, Chilean President Gabriel Boric warned that such measures challenge “principles that govern international trade.”

Colombian President Gustavo Petro, who has clashed with Trump before, said via X that the tariffs marked a milestone: “Today the neoliberalism that proclaimed free-trade policies all over the world has died.”

Analysts say there’s little to be gained from an all-out trade war, for the United States or other countries.

“If Trump really imposes high tariffs, Europe will have to respond, but the paradox is that the EU would be better off doing nothing,” said Matteo Villa, a senior analyst at Italy’s Institute for International Political Studies.

“On the other hand, Trump seems to understand only the language of force, and this indicates the need for a strong and immediate response,” Villa said. “Probably the hope, in Brussels, is that the response will be strong enough to induce Trump to negotiate and, soon, to backtrack.”

AP journalists around the world contributed to this story.

People walk past an electronic stock board showing the day's early loss of Japan's Nikkei 225 index at a securities firm Thursday, April 3, 2025 in Tokyo.(AP Photo/Shuji Kajiyama)

U.S. President Donald Trump is seen on a screen as currency traders work at the foreign exchange dealing room of the KEB Hana Bank headquarters in Seoul, South Korea, Thursday, April 3, 2025. (AP Photo/Ahn Young-joon)

Containers are stacked at the Port of Los Angeles Wednesday, April 2, 2025, in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Damian Dovarganes)

Cranes and shipping containers are seen at a port in Pyeongtaek, South Korea, Wednesday, April 2, 2025. (AP Photo/Ahn Young-joon)

Employee Jon Vazquez-DeAnda cuts keys for a customer at employee-owned Devon Hardware, Wednesday, April 2, 2025, in Chicago. (AP Photo/Erin Hooley)

This photo shows vehicles bound for foreign countries at a logistics center in Kawasaki near Tokyo, Thursday, March 27, 2025. (Michi Ono/Kyodo News via AP)

President Donald Trump departs after signing an executive order at an event to announce new tariffs in the Rose Garden of the White House, Wednesday, April 2, 2025, in Washington. (AP Photo/Evan Vucci)

President Donald Trump speaks during an event to announce new tariffs in the Rose Garden at the White House, Wednesday, April 2, 2025, in Washington. (AP Photo/Mark Schiefelbein)

President Donald Trump speaks during an event to announce new tariffs in the Rose Garden of the White House, Wednesday, April 2, 2025, in Washington. (AP Photo/Evan Vucci)

President Donald Trump holds a signed executive order during an event to announce new tariffs in the Rose Garden of the White House, Wednesday, April 2, 2025, in Washington. (AP Photo/Evan Vucci)

President Donald Trump speaks during an event to announce new tariffs in the Rose Garden at the White House, Wednesday, April 2, 2025, in Washington, as Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick listens. (AP Photo/Mark Schiefelbein)